Tag Archives: relationships

Being the best version of you

16 Nov

Waiting for New Years to change the way you live your life means missing out on living time to the full, so I’m starting from today. My betterment scheme includes both appearance and emotional-based changes, to make me feel better about who I am. Rather than trying to be a poor imitation of someone I’m not, I’m going to be the best version I possibly can be of myself.

Self-help is a huge sector in the book industry recently, but I think that the best way to improve your life is to identify what you don’t like and change it, no matter what title or label you give this change. I think this advice cheat-sheet could help anyone improve themselves and the way they feel about themselves. Or course, some things (like “don’t be show-offy”) will vary for each person. You might want to replace that with “be more outgoing”. Anyway, print this (or your own list) out, cut it out, and stick it somewhere you’ll see it everyday. For more subtle reminders, since I don’t want everyone seeing my list for self improvement in my school homework journal for example, take a word from each sentence and write them everywhere to trigger your memory while not letting everyone in on the secret.

  • Smile more often, and bring happiness into your life and other’s lives straight away.
  • Be nicer, kinder and softer, and discard the brash-side you use to hide your insecurities.
  • Don’t be patronising or show-offy, avoid trying to look cool.
  • Give everyone a chance, be sweet rather than sour.
  • Make an effort with clothes and hair, always feel good about how you look.
  • Avoid procrastination and keep your deadlines.
  • Practise any commitments you’ve taken up, such as instruments or sports.
  • Actively be in a good mood most of the time.
  • Try and ignore insecurities and make yourself act quietly confident until you feel it naturally.
  • Eat lots of fruit and veg.
  • Do a little exercise every night to help you sleep.
  • Sleep for eight hours!

This is my to-do list. I’ll check back here to tell you all how I’m getting along with the whole self-improvement thing.

Can boys and girls be (just) best friends?

11 Nov

I’ve been thinking about this a lot, because I was recently talking to an acquaintance (who’s a guy) who claimed that guys and girls really can’t be best friends without having any romantic feelings all tangled up with the friendship. I don’t think I agree. Of course, there are guys I’m friends with where there does sometimes seem to be a bit of awkwardness or tension because we’re not both of the same sex, but I don’t think that a true friendship is impossible.

One of my best friends is a guy. He straight, cute, and really sweet. Yet I have absolutely no romantic interest in him, at all. I mean that in all honestly and truthfulness, and I really think he feels the same way. We are totally ok with complimenting each other on our achievements, or each others appearance, and spend a lot of time together. Yet the idea of kissing him really feels wrong. I mean, he’s like a brother. And this isn’t friendzonation really: it’s a two way thing. We’ve discussed it before actually, when I was going out with a guy, my friend said (while we were cycling through the woods near his house) how is relieved him I was going out with someone, so people didn’t keep asking questions about us.

The crazy kind of stuff we do. From mytrueselft.tumblr.com

As well as being nice to each other, we are perfectly adequate at being mean to each other. We both acknowledge that we hang out with different kinds of people: he finds my circle of friends nerdy and I think his are big-headed. We fight, ignore each other, bitch about each other behind each other’s backs, and fangirl (he might complain about that verb) over Doctor Who, The Hunger Games, The Sisters Grimm and Harry Potter together. We sit together in art class and help each other out, show each other our English and history essays, and try and figure out maths homework over text.

We get each other presents too when we’re on holidays, and do each other favours: he’s just ordered me a mockingjay pin off Etsy (I’ll post a picture as soon as it arrives). Next month we’re going on a four hour train journey to look at NCAD (the art college in our capital) together, and we are both fantastically excited.

So I don’t believe that boys and girls can’t just be friends. Or maybe we’re just the exception to the rule. I’m really interested in what you think though. Do you agree or disagree? Has a friendship ever turned into something more for you? Leave your comments below please!

 
NB!

Since writing this post, I would like to add that shortly after meeting a guy, another guy friend who I would have considered almost as close as the one I described above… admitted he liked me.

Being too nice

11 Nov

I originally posted this on another blog of mine, The Sprocketeers, but then I realised it didn’t suit the blog at all, so I moved it over here. I think I’ve anther candidate that would suit this blog better too…

***

A friend recently accused me of being too nice, and a pushover. I disagree. The question in the title was asked sarcastically.

Apparently I let other people influence me too much and I don’t stick up for my beliefs often enough. This friend is very vocal when she meets an opposing view, and feels I should act more like this.

However, I never let other people sway my beliefs, unless they bring up a point I have never thought of before which would drastically alter my perception of something. If that happens, I tend not to get caught up in it, wait until later, then figure out if my opinion has changed or not.

Continue reading